Monday, April 29, 2013

Moving On, Moving Forward

W.'s gone only 3 days and it feels like an eternity.  So.. I keep myself busy by continuously putting things away.  The monotonous task of going through your things and finding a new home for them.. ugh.  While slightly enjoyable being in a new dwelling, it's daunting to realize you have so much (and I don't even have a lot!).  It's the smaller things that are most annoying; where do I want to put notes?  #firstworldproblems

We're still discussing months/dates for me to move.  He's ultimately leaving the decision up to me.  We talked about it again last night and I have a month/date in mind, but still kicking it around.  Also looking at flight costs.

I'm overwhelmed; how am I supposed to get rid of everything - everything - in a span of (a potential) 3 months?  I had a hard enough time doing it when I was moving from Apt A to House B.  I have to let go of my entire life - a life I've become attached to in a city I love.  How do I decide what to ship?  If I ship /this/, should I also ship /that/?  What's the line?

It's funny; when we were sitting at Union Station on the last leg of his journey, we were waiting for the GO train (to meet my friend to go to the airport).  I contemplated going with him (not even lying, even if it was just for a brief second).  I had my Dutch passport on me, 2 days worth of clothes, my purse and ID.  I was good to go.  He put it a bit in perspective, said that I'd just 'left' everything behind (books, clothes, stereo, whatever) and everything that I can't currently decide about.  Aside from pictures maybe, there was nothing I felt I needed to rush back for (to be honest, he was the one who brought that up).  All I could think of was, "Well, I feel bad for having to leave my stuff for someone else to get rid of. That's not right."

Perspective.  Attachment.  When is something important to you, and why?

Something came up and I have to jet.  Ending this blog post. Gotta run!

Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Down Time

Well, I'm taking advantage of some down time; W. is having a nap and I'm just catching up on emails (I don't think I've turned my computer on at all in the better part of the two weeks) and sitting with a tea.  It's a beautiful day out and I think we'll go for a walk later on.

I'm settled in the new place.  Hrm.. settled is a loose term.  I'm.. inhabiting.  There are still boxes and random objects strewn all over.  The kitchen is the closest to being complete (of course; I mean, let's discuss priorities) ;)  I still really need to downsize and get rid of more, though.  There isn't enough room for everything.  Not just the kitchen, but the bedroom (I need to fit a dresser, a tall boy, PLUS a closet full.. all  into one dresser).  There are a few items I still need to sell off (anyone local want an air conditioner, a bread maker, a dresser and/or a kitchen table/chairs?).

When we had moving day, I kept thinking about the transition; things disappearing from the old place, looking bare, then getting used to new surroundings with the new place.  Babu is still at the old place (can't bring him to the new) and still no owner.  Really having a hard time and I'm not sure why it hasn't worked itself out.

I think we're going to work outside this afternoon.  There is some lawn furniture that needs cleaning and it's a good excuse to enjoy the weather.  The property backs onto the river and there's a table out there just asking to be sat at.  Morning cup of coffee, anyone?  Or perhaps a nice sunset...

It's nice to have W. here for the house transition.  Not just for the physical help of moving and unpacking/sorting, but for the support, for the company within new walls, for someone to talk to or make meals for when I'm not in the mood to do other house stuff.  The last week and a half have been fabulous.  Our union at the airport was a joyous one and not at all awkward or 'weird' (for never having met in person).  The coming-together was just confirmation of what we already knew; we belong together and everything that we do is natural and feels right.  We're both very happy.

Well, W. is up, so I best get up too.

We spend Thursday night in Toronto and he's back on the plane Friday.  Then.... we wait until I move there. No, I don't know when I'm moving yet (it's the million-dollar question everyone's asking).  It hasn't been discussed yet, though sometime before winter.

Hope y'all are having a good week!

Saturday, April 13, 2013

Counting Down..

11 hours!


Man, I don't even know if I can eat right now, but I'm gonna try.  He didn't sleep much at all last night.  Miraculously, I did (but then, I had the pinnacle of my stress a couple days ago, whereas he was calm until last night).

I've checked and so far his flights are on time.  His plane gets into Newark at 11am.  Then he has a miserable 4-hr layover until Toronto.

Here we go.......!

Last Sleep!

Een nachtjes slapen! (One more sleep!)

Wow.  Tomorrow. Can you believe it?  TO-MOR-ROW.


And then he'll be home.

Prayers and positive thoughts for a safe and on-time flight please!

Friday, April 12, 2013

Counting Down

TWEE nachtjes slapen! (TWO more sleeps!)


..On an unrelated note, when the universe sees that you need to slow down, it will indeed force you to slow down.  I burned myself at work today.  Hot/boiling water down the front of my chest (don't ask).  I'm fine.  We acted soon enough to prevent second degree burns (though that will be verified tomorrow).  Geez.  You can't take me anywhere.  Pros about working in a hospital.  So, I will be taking it easy the next 24 hrs.  When I need to be most busiest.  *sigh*  Such is life. 

Tuesday, April 9, 2013

There Was Once This Dutch Girl......

It'd been about a month since I was in Toronto to drop off the paperwork for my passport.  They quoted me 2 weeks, though I was skeptical with all the rush they've had to deal with, with everyone getting their paperwork in by the deadline.  I was thinking more of 3-4 weeks.  Well, this week was approaching 4 weeks.  I know better than to "let things develop" with this process (for the times I thought that, so much could have been done), so I emailed my contact at the Dutch consulate.  Sure enough she wrote back in confirmation... "They say no news is good news. Your application was accepted and you should receive your passport by next week."  I was in shock.  I stared at the words on the screen (read from my phone this morning at work).  I won't lie; I even shed a slight (happy) tear or two.  Everything has come to fruition.  

One more things crossed off the Bucket List. 

Wait, I just crossed something off my Bucket List?  All of these thoughts meshing with it like age, stage in life.. and really, a bunch of adjectives I can't think of right now cause I'm so tired.  You get where I'm going with that.  

I've sat with this news all day and I still can't get over it.  I mean, really sit with it.  W. is still without computer/Skype so I had to call him and share the news - he was the first to tell.  We had a great conversation.  We hate not being able to see each other, though.  Even more.. not celebrating in person. BUT.. 5 more sleeps :)  We will have a proper celebration this weekend, incorporating a drink of some kind, I'm sure.  Or hey, just actually being in the same room will be nice and reason enough for celebration.  

Wow.  This weekend. 

Time, it is a flyin'. 

For now, no one has agreed to go out with me for a celebratory drink (or coffee) which I'm a bit bummed about, but honestly, I'm so tired right now I'm not sure how much I could keep up with conversation.  Perhaps tomorrow will be better.  

More to write, but perhaps when I'm more coherent.

Saturday, April 6, 2013

One Week

One week!!  This time next week I'll be on a train to my friend where we'll hang out for the day then go pick W. up.  Wow.  A week.  I can't believe it.  I really, really can't.

And it can't come soon enough.

To top it off, this week will be extra torture; his computer's in the shop and we have no Skype.  We tried Google Hangout, but his sound wasn't working; he could hear me but I couldn't hear him.  Let me tell you how interesting that conversation was (a mix of voice, mime, hand-written notes and mirrors)!   He was so cute though; he tried to make it work before we gave up and went back to IM.

6 sleeps.

Wednesday, April 3, 2013

I Want You to Introduce You to Unpopular Opinions

Ange has written a thought-provoking blog post recently and I'd love for you to go over and take a look if you have some time.  Her self-titled blog and said entry: Unpopular Opinions: It's not my fault.  She talks about..*gasp*.. wait for it.. body image.  Something around us all the time and something I battle with on a daily basis.

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